smiles

The old saying I remember.

Smiles is the longest word because there’s a mile between each s”.

Sometimes it’s interesting and reaches frustrating the cultural and social differences from barang to Khmer. My wife and I have had some rough moments about her desire to see me happy all the time and mine to just be how I feel.

What has happened is I’ve just told her there are people I do not like. That don’t make me happy. She understands. She does not make me see them. But she feels I should not show this. I should maintain some outer balance of happiness even if I dislike the person or thing happening. Honestly like our landlord. I do not like them. I won’t associate with them. She gets it.

Bit it shows the gulf and chasm. She sees them as friendly and helpful people she sees every day. I see them as nosy and always watching. I wish a degree of privacy. She sees a communal thing.

See the difference?

How can the two world views reach an accord? Well she has to accept my view and I accept hers and we don’t try to change the other. Then we live in some semblance of mutuality. It is hard for both of us. She wishes to live here. I wish to go.

The card finally played is happiness. She simply wants me to be happy. I cannot be here. And I show it. So she goes looking for a new place. Meanwhile she agrees I have the right to show how I feel. She has the right to love it here.

And we smile again. See? It’s not so far. That mile shrinks when we’re together. It’s still a big walk sometimes from barang to Khmer. Especially when I feel like I am not either. Never could feel like one or want to be the other.

But the distance is so close now. See the mile shrinking to smiles.

smilessmiles



Date
May 22, 2024